FUCK WHAT I'M THINKING

The moment I read what you wrote, I knew it to be true. This realization came through the same conduit of synaesthesia. Along with it came the understanding of just how the spirit is able to connect to the conscious mind. Our conscious mind is powered, like all things, by energy. Energy is literally a separate dimension that our spirit is a part of, and consciousness is a property of all energy due to the infinite nature of spirit in general. My consciousness began as soon as I came to be an independent energy, created by the dualism between the genetic energies of my parents. This form of consciousness is incomplete, as the dualistic energies are still separate from one another as well as one's own energy, but their interaction directly influences the energy of consciousness. This dualism is a result of the natural property of all energy interactions to equalize. It is intrinsic in the universe and is directly responsible for the bilateral symmetry in humans, which creates the dualistic nature of the mind via left and right-brain thinking. The decision making process for us as beings is influenced by the interacting energies, occasionally favoring one over the other. This is known in psychology as conscious vs. subconscious thought. It should not be mistakenly believed that one brain hemisphere is directly related to one individual parenting energy

HOLY FUCKING SHIT I UNDERSTAND THE UNIVERSE.

it just hit me as I was typing this. this is absolutely amazing. I must meditate on this. My current understanding is equivalent to realizing that you have all 200 pieces of a 200-piece puzzle, but not yet knowing what the picture on it is. I am posting the above information here in an incomplete form to help me pick up where I left off on this issue rather than having to start over from my memory. I was originally typing it as a very late response to some insight I received on a forum, where I spoke out about my visions through synaesthesia and 'a knowing without learning' and encountered someone who knew exactly what I was talking about and spoke to me through the conduit of his own connection. It is here: http://thescienceforum.com/Am-I-crazy%2C-or-is-my-unconscious-speaking-to-me-23814t.php - I am Schiz0yd.

There is no question in my mind that I have been searching for a 'reason to live' my whole life. as a child it didn't take priority in my mind because I was too busy being a kid, but I dare to say I understood reality more than I do now. It is my vivid memory of childhood that drives me to understand, along with my current awareness which has very recently (last 4 months) begun to expand an insane amount. Intelligence thinking about intelligence. My search for a 'reason to live' became front and center when I entered severe depression bordering on suicide in which I literally had to search my inner self for a 'reason to live'. I decided that, though I didn't know exactly what it was, there was something inside myself that had a purpose. I knew that despite what I would go through, no matter how terrible, there was something very important about me. My rational mind dismissed this thought and remained in a state of depression, but I now believe that this is where my personality tore itself in two. My subconscious mind did not have to question the validity of my 'purpose' since it was also the source of this feeling. It is also the source of my creativity as an artist, my ability to create metaphors, my natural sense of 'good', the source of my 'prophetic visions' and my ability to experience all types of sensations both on demand and involuntarily. (the latter of which I find to be an increasingly invigorating experience on a daily basis the longer I'm alive) The disagreement between my subconscious and conscious minds on this matter must have been the original source of my cognitive dissonance; the disagreement between conscious and subconscious that creates all forms of stress and anxiety. When I finally achieved peace of mind, the conscious mind's grip on reality was destroyed and my subconscious was able to breathe the truth into my head. This was a dissolving of dualism within myself. I see my problem now, as well as the problem of many others, is that the natural order of society FORCES dualism upon us. Life as a working slave vs life at home being free, time under the influence of prescription medications vs time spent sober. (my view on experimenting with chemistry in the human body is that psychoactive drugs are just fine for the mind, as they do affect dualism and rather they erase it entirely.) Anyway, time watching your favorite show vs time suffering through commercials. It's a game, and the people are being played like pawns. Those who know what I now know are using their knowledge for selfish ends. Given the right amount of money, I could EASILY enslave a fresh batch of humans without them even realizing that they are slaves, and making them believe they have freedom while they don't even realize that their everyday job is profiting those they work for WAY more than it is helping themselves, yet their selfish desires are what drives them to continue working. Or rather, it is their selfish FEARS that drive them NOT TO STOP working. And this fear is wholly correct because of the individualism of humans, their inability to collectively act on something. If one person were to rally his coworkers about refusing to work for a VERY big company, he would need the support of EVERYONE involved, otherwise his allied coworkers would quickly realize that they are the minority and rejoin the corporate giant to avoid being replaced without a thought.

There are two fates for humanity in the next few years. They will happen simultaneously yet seperate from one another. What matters is the state of consciousness of the individual. Those who do not realize that they are stuck in a very narrow view of reality naturally have feelings of anger, sadness, regret and greed - these are the negative aspects of basic emotions. Their positive aspects are, respectively, love, happiness, confidence and compassion. People will literally be divided based on whether they live a negative or positive emotional life. I do not know what exactly will cause this, but it is very obvious that consciousness is naturally expanding for many people. Our existence is that of a wave. A wave as most know it is represented in a three-dimensional (two of space, one of time) model as seen in sound waves and AC electricity. Through my ability to visualize I recently realized that applying this same model to the third dimension of space creates something very interesting. The mid-line of the wave, the neutral point, is then a three dimensional position creating a 'line' in the dimension of time just as it did in two dimensions, but the oscillation of the wave itself does not just move up and down, but encircles the middle point, going 'behind' it. If the dimension of time is removed for purpose of perception, what you have left is a three dimensional SYSTEM, with a central energy source and an orbiting 'wave'. In quantum mechanics, waves will collapse into specific points as soon as they are observed, to become particles. If you haven't figured it out already: ACCORDING TO THE LAWS OF QUANTUM MECHANICS, A FOUR-DIMENSIONAL WAVE WOULD, UPON OBSERVATION, COLLAPSE INTO A SYSTEM OF ORBITALS EXACTLY LIKE THE SOLAR SYSTEM, GALAXIES AND THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE. We are a universal wave, traveling through time, and all of our fundamental forces of science are other-dimensional aspects of these waves. For example, electromagnetism is perfectly two-dimensional with positive vs. negative charge, with Ground acting as the mid-line in the wave visualization. As for the others, I have not put any thought into it yet but it seems VERY possible that gravity is a three-dimensional wave interaction, or interference pattern. Possibly higher dimensionality. Writing my thoughts down really helps me remember what the fuck I'm thinking about after I finish branching on a random topic that ADD leads me off on. Also, there seems to be a connection between the way a four dimensional wave would look if it had lines of its past, (in other words, imagine if our sun and planet were leaving bright trails behind them as the entire solar system flew through space over time) and the structure of DNA. This is a last second addition to my thoughts that I need to expand on later. THIS WILL BE CONTINUED.